last update: Wednesday, October 10, 2001
Movie Quotes

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Quotes from Heathers (1989)

Heather Chandler: They all want me as a friend or a fuck. I'm worshiped at Westerburg and I'm only a junior.

All the Heathers: "How Very!"

Veronica: This may seem like a really stupid question...

J.D.: There *are* no stupid questions.

Veronica: You inherit 5 million dollars the same day aliens land on the earth and say they will blow it up in 2 days. What do you do?

J.D.: That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.

Courtney: If I got that money, I'd give it all to the homeless. Every cent.

Veronica: You're beautiful.

J.D.: The extreme always seems to make an impression.

Veronica: I say we just grow up, be adults and die.

Veronica: All we want is to be treated like human beings, not to be experimented on like guinea pigs or patronized like bunny rabbits.

Veronica's Dad: I don't patronize bunny rabbits!

J.D.: Seven schools in seven states and the only thing different is my locker combination.

Veronica: If you were happy every day of your life you wouldn't be a human being. You'd be a game-show host.

Veronica: Heather, why are you such a mega-bitch?

Heather Duke: Because I can be.

J.D.: Wanna go out tonight? Catch a movie? Miniature golf?

Veronica: I was thinking more along the lines of slitting Heather Duke's wrists open, making it look like suicide.

J.D.: Ah, now you're talking. I can be up for that. I've already started underlining meaningful passages in her copy of Moby Dick, if you know what I mean?

Veronica: My teenage angst bullshit now has a body count.

J.D.: The only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven.

Veronica: I just killed my best friend!

J.D.: And your worst enemy.

Veronica: Does that matter?

Veronica: She's my best friend. God, I hate her.

J.D: (after finding that Veronica had hung herself) "I loved you, sure I was coming up here to kill you, but first I was going to try and get you back..."

Veronica after she shoots J.D.: I blow guys like you out of my life.

Heather Duke: Veronica, you look like hell.

Veronica: Thanks, I just got back.

Hippie Teacher/Counselor: Whether or not a teenager decides to kill themselves is the biggest decision of their life.

J.D: (after Veronica stops him from blowing up the school) "Let's say I blew up the school, I blew up every school, then what are you going to do with your life?"

Veronica: Heather, my dear, there's a new sheriff in town.


Quotes from Kuffs (1992)

George Kuffs: I got women to do, places to see!

[At the Police Academy] George Kuffs: Why are we doing so much running? Aren't we all going to be in cars?

George Kuffs: I'm looking for a really big gun which holds a lot of bullets.

Gun Salesman: God bless you, young man.

George Kuffs to the camera: I always wanted a gun...

Gun Salesman: Is this what you had in mind? It's a 9mm Beretta. 15 in the clip, 1 in the pipe. George Kuffs: Got one that holds more?

Gun Salesman: No.

George Kuffs: I'll take two.

Ted Bukovsky: Next time shit before you sign in. Shit! Sign in! In the car!

George Kuffs: Am I gonna be tested on this later?

Ted Bukovsky: Now, if I'm gonna be killed on the job, it's gonna be by a fucking bullet, not a fucking bus. Now turn this fucking car around and let's get back on your fucking patrol.

George Kuffs: You may have a limited vocabulary, Ted.

Ted Bukovsky: Fuck you!

George Kuffs: What can they possibly see in a man who dresses that badly???


Quotes from Pump Up the Volume (1991)

Mark Hunter: Feeling screwed up at a screwed up time in a screwed up place does not necessarily make you screwed up.

Hard Harry: Sometimes being a teenager is worse than being dead.

Marla Hunter (his mother): We think you should see a psychiatrist.

Mark Hunter: Is it that obvious?

Nora: "I say do it, I don't care what just do it, jam me, jack me, push me, pull me, talk hard!"

Hard Harry: "All the good themes have been used up and turned into theme parks."

Hard Harry: "I don't find it exactly cheerful to be living in like a totally exhausted decade with nothing to do and no one to look up to."

Hard Harry: "The fit hits the shan."

Hard Harry: "So be it."

Sign made by listeners of show: "The truth is a virus."

Hard Harry: "I don't mind being dejected and rejected but I'm not going to be ashamed about it!"

Hard Harry: "I was just thinking how different we all are, but how we all basically need the same things."

Hard Harry: "I was just thinking how strong people can be."

Hard Harry: "I like the idea that a voice can go somewhere uninvited and just hang out."

Hard Harry: "An idea is like a dirty thought in a nice clean mind. A dirty thought is like a virus, it can kill all the good thoughts."

Thanks to Yola, who sent me the majority of the quotes for Pump Up The Volume


Quotes from True Romance (1993)

Clarence: If I had to fuck any man, I mean if my life depended on it, then it'd be Elvis.

Clarence: Something this last week has taught me; it's better to have a gun and not need it than to need a gun and not have it.

Clifford Worley: Who are you?

Vincenzo Coccotti: I'm the Anti-Christ. You get me in a vendetta kind of mood, you will tell the angels in heaven that you had never seen evil so singularly personified as you did in the face of the man who killed you. My name is Vincenzo Coccotti.

[Don Vincenzo is complaining about how lousy Clifford Worley is to lie]

Vincenzo Coccotti: Now, what we have got here is a little game of show and tell, and you don't wanna show me nothing and tell me everything.

Clifford Worley: You're Sicilian, ha?

Vincenzo Coccotti: Yeah, Sicilian.

Clifford Worley: I read a lot. Especially about things... about history. I find that shit fascinating. I don't know whether you know or not. Sicilians were spawned by niggers.

Vincenzo Coccotti: Come again?

Clifford Worley: It's a fact. See, Sicilians have black blood pumpin' through their hearts. If you don't believe me you can look it up. Hundreds and hundreds of years ago the moors conquered Sicily and the moors are niggers.

Vincenzo Coccotti: Yes...

Clifford Worley: Sicilians were like wops from northern Italy. They all had blonde hair and blue eyes but when the moors moved in there, well they changed the whole country. They did so much fuckin' with Sicilian women that they changed the whole bloodline forever. That's why blonde hair and blue eyes became black hair and dark skin. It's absolutely amazing to me to think that to this day, hundreds of years later, that Sicilians still carry that nigger gene. Now this...

Vincenzo Coccotti: Hahahahahahahaha...

Clifford Worley: No, I'm quoting. It's written, it's a fact, it's written.

Vincenzo Coccotti: Hahahahahahahaha... I love this guy.

Clifford Worley: Your ancestors were niggers and your great-great-great-great grandmother fucked a nigger and she had a half nigger kid. If that's a fact, tell me, am I lying?

[In the Night Club after Drexl has beaten Clarence]

Drexl Spivey: He must have thought it is white boy day. It ain't white boy day, is it?

Monty: No man, It ain't white boy day.


Quotes from Broken Arrow (1996)

Deakins: See what happened there?

Hale: I am pretty sure you hit me!

Deakins: George Foreman has nothing left

Hale: I always liked Bruce Lee movies myself

Hale: You don't understand, it really is yours, I took it out of your wallet while you were in the shower

Hale: Usual, scare the cows, wake the farmers

Hale: Fantastic. The day we go to war against Utah, we are really going to kiss ass.

Hale: You know what your problem is?

Deakins: I am always right!

Hale: No, you think you are always right!

Deakins: You really love this shit, don't you?

Hale: Where else can you fly a 2 billion dollar aircraft at 800mph a 100 feet off the ground?

Hale: It's the nukes. I know you, you love having the power of God at your fingertips, you get off on it.

Carmichael: Clyde I am sitting here looking at half the valley and there's nothing............HOLY SHIT!!

Giles: We're better off telling the truth.

Colonel: The truth? How did you get this job?

Giles: A broken what?

Colonel: A Broken Arrow

Giles: I don't know what is scarier, the fact that we lost a nuclear weapon, or the fact that it happens so often, that there is a term for it.

Carmichael: Just put it down and I won't have to kill you

Hale: This isn't a stand-off, I've got the gun!

Carmichael: I don't keep it loaded.

Gun goes off

Hale: I thought you said it wasn't loaded

Carmichael: I lied

Pritchard: Maybe the Son of a Bitch is dead.

Deakins: What a terrible thing to say (appearing out of the desert like an apparition).

Carmichael: Watch out for the black stuff! It is cryptogamic soil. One footprint takes centuries to repair.

Hale: (muttering) Thought it was a mine or something... Endangered dirt, that's a new one!

Carmichael: Why the hell are they shooting at us?

Hale: I don't think we have time to discuss it right now.

Deakins: The southwest will be a quiet neighbourhood for about 10,000 years.

Deakins: (Through gritted teeth) Would you mind not shooting at the thermonuclear weapons?

Carmichael: Did you learn that in survival school? (after Hale firebombs a humvee)

Hale: New Jersey, Trenton, New Jersey

Deakins: You just activated a nuclear weapon my friend!

Deakins: (again through gritted teeth) How many times do I have to say it, please don't shoot at the nuclear weapons.

Deakins: (after killing Pritchard) I just realised something, I have never actually killed someone before. I don't know what the big deal is, really I don't.

Deakins: I say Goddamn, what a rush!!

Carmichael: (after Hale shoots bad guy through her legs) Wow!!

Hale: That was a first for me too!!

Deakins: (as he arms the nuclear weapon) Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke!!

Kelly: I am not ready to die

Deakins: Everybody dies Kelly, I am as good a reason as any.

Hale: You're outta your mind.

Deakins: Yeah, ain't it cool.

Hale: I am serious Deak, you mind has taken a walk off the map.

Deakins: Yeah, but I'm still going to kick your ass.

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